Whether we’re talking about the life of the party or a maven in the social networking world, all “highly social people” have some characteristics in common. Today, I’ll attempt to identify some of them so that we can all learn how to be more like them. Of course, if you have more to add, please use the comments section! I probably could write a book on this like all the other “7 Habits” folks, but I’ll leave it to a blog for now!
Highly social people know who they are and they act like it. They aren’t the codependents who go around being who everyone else wants them to be. Instead, they know what they have to offer and they know where their weaknesses are. Instead of pretending they are good at something they aren’t, they know how to be humble and admit areas where they could use help. They know this makes them a better person, not a lesser one.
Highly social people are aware of their surroundings. I’ve seen many socialites scan a room and walk towards the person standing in the corner not talking to anyone. Being social doesn’t mean you’re a cool kid. It means that you know how to be aware of what’s going on around you and you can meet needs where they exist. They zoom right into the people in a crowd (IRL or virtual) and find those with shared interests. This takes a bit of practice, but people who succeed in social situations are able to seek these people out and find common ground.
You can’t be the light in the room if you’re incredibly boring. You have to be interesting – have a reason for people to talk to you. Whether it’s a project you’re working on or a cool hairstyle, sticking out a bit from the crowd helps you to be more interesting to others in the room.
Genuinely curious to learn. True socialites have mastered the art of listening. They ask important questions and listen carefully for the answers. They know how to bring out the best in a person by listening for their strengths and asking probing questions.
Social situations aren’t just about what people can do for you. Too many people work a networking event like a dating game – talking long enough to see if there’s something you need and then abandoning if not. Highly social people realize that for every person that can help them, there’s someone else that they can help! They constantly find ways to ADD value.
There’s some children’s song about working together. I’d sing it right now if I could think of it. What I’m trying to say is that two heads are better than one. People who learn to collaborate with others rather than compete make it much farther in this world. (At least in my opinion!) Who doesn’t want to give to someone who first gave to them?
Tell Stories Worth Sharing
Whether via blog post or drunken story, every highly social person has a way of captivating an audience with a story – a story that’s so good it gets repeated over and over. Think of that friend you met on Twitter who is always posting awesome content. You feel like you retweet everything they post. THAT is a socialite!
Photo by Morberg